1. And you realize that the problem has never been empty. Your body is an instrument that you’ve never felt like you could play right, but it was never about the blank sheet music around your bones so much as the heavy within them.
2. The full. The wait. The stop. Please, stop yelling at each other for just one night and pay attention to the seven-year-old girl with no eyelashes in the next room. The go, the say something. And in the silence, you wonder how it ever came to this; and you remember the way the first boy who ever liked you back looked at you like he could see you. Don’t think about how he chose to walk away. Don’t ask yourself why not thinking about it feels so hard to carry.
3. The: why is this so hard to fucking carry? Sweetheart, listen, when your palms start to sweat, that’s when you know you’ve been holding on too long. That’s when you need to let go of the rope to tend to the burns underneath.
4. Other people are not medicine.
5. Make peace with your own hands.
6. There will be days when you will be sitting on a bench in public, alone in your car, across the dinner table to a family you don’t recognize, and all of the space around you will make the webs between your fingers ache. And pools of begging reasons to why no one wants to gather you broken in their arms at night will begin to settle in the bow of your eyelids. You wonder how so much can fit inside such a small person and no one notices. Do not make homes for them.
7. Pour them out. Water the soil beneath your feet. Your blonde fringe that was never soft enough for another’s hands, your average GPA, your rough around the edges, their fragmented example of love, his not enough, your soft, your distant, your depression, their divorce, your hollow poems, boy shorts and pale legs, your too much of not enough for another;
9. Smile at strangers. Give. Give, and don’t expect. Love, and don’t doubt despite its persistent knocking against your fragile, fresh frame. You are enough. You are enough. You’re filled with so much enough between your bruised heart and sore ribs that it’s agonizingly easy to fuse the two in sadness.
10. No one said that the only thing your bones can hold is ache."
-valentina thompson (via theseoverusedwords)